Wall Street just handed Nvidia the crown 👑

Jensen rules the markets, and everyone else is just living in his silicon shadow.

Author

Jason Paloma
June 26, 2025 • Estimated Reading Time: 5 minutes

😎 Market Vibes

Wall Street just handed Nvidia the crown - and the crowd went wild. The AI king is now the most valuable company on Earth, Bitcoin's back above $108K, and even sleepy spice stocks are catching fire. But behind the rally, some real weirdness is bubbling... buckle up.

🧞 Wishful Thinking Rally

  • 💻 Nvidia Tops the World: Nvidia just stole the crown from Microsoft with a $3.76 trillion market cap, officially becoming the planet's most valuable company. AI mania isn't cooling - it's accelerating, and Jensen's empire is leading the charge.

  • 🔋 Micron's Monster Quarter: Micron posted a 38.2% revenue jump to $8.05B, torching expectations thanks to relentless AI server demand. Shares popped as traders rotated hard into semis.

  • 🌶️ McCormick Spices Up Earnings: The spice giant crushed estimates with $1.66B in quarterly sales, sending shares up 4.9%. Inflation may be cooling, but flavor is apparently a non-negotiable expense.

  • 🪙 Bitcoin Crosses $108K: BTC is holding firm above $108K as crypto bulls celebrate $3.9B in ETF inflows over the past two weeks. Institutions are clearly no longer on the sidelines.

  • 🛢️ Crude Creeps Up: Brent oil ticks to ~$67 a barrel, still down over 20% YoY. Energy traders aren't buying the inflation panic - yet.

💸 Trade Talk

Nvidia just did the unthinkable: leapfrogged Microsoft to become the world's most valuable company at $3.76 trillion. That's not just AI hype - it's a full-blown silicon supremacy coup. Investors are treating every GPU order like it's a golden ticket to Wonka's data center. Jensen Huang might as well be the new Fed Chair, because his quarterly earnings do more to move markets than Powell speeches at this point.

Meanwhile, Bitcoin's surge past $108K suggests that crypto bulls are back in the driver's seat, fueled by institutional inflows and a weakening dollar. The "digital gold" narrative is alive and well - and this time Wall Street's not laughing.

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🧠 Big Brain Energy

$3.9B - That's the net inflow into Bitcoin spot ETFs over the past 12 days, signaling a powerful tailwind for the crypto market.

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🧨The Outrage Meter

President Trump is reportedly considering booting Jerome Powell before his term ends - because obviously what the market needs right now is more chaos. Why wait for 2026 when you can preemptively throw monetary policy into a blender?

Also: Reddit day traders are now bidding up penny stocks based on AI-generated press releases. One ticker jumped 400% yesterday before anyone realized the "CEO quote" was fake and written by ChatGPT. Peak 2025 energy.

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